On Any Other Day
by MarqueeMoonGirl
Summary: Seeking to forget makes exile all the longer. 2DxPaula. ONESHOT


_On Any Other Day_

_By MarqueeMoonGirl_

---

It was late at night when she knocked on the door to Kong Studios.

Murdoc, dressed only in a torn pair of jeans and leather boots, opened the door almost immediately, a dour expression on his face. "Took you long enough."

"My car couldn't make it up the hill. I had to climb over the landfill. I can't understand why you have the stupid thing here in the first place."

Murdoc lazily shrugged. "It keeps the batshit fans away."

"Fair enough." She motioned Murdoc to step aside, but he stayed squarely in the doorframe. "Murdoc, move. I came here to see Stuart."

Murdoc looked at her face, taking in every premature wrinkle and line in her face that makeup attempted to hide, and then caught her eye. "You look like shit, Paula. Absolute shit."

Behind sunglasses, Paula Cracker winced slightly, her cheeks turning red, but she held the bass player's eye. "Almost a decade of sex, drugs and rock n' roll. We junkies can't all look as good as you do, Murdoc."

"Fair enough." Murdoc finally moved out the door, letting Paula enter Kong Studios for the first time in years.

Murdoc and Paula stopped in front of the elevator. Murdoc jabbed at the 'down' button repeatedly. "You remember the way, love?"

The elevator dinged, the door sliding open. Without answering, Paula stepped inside and pressed the button labeled 'Carpark'. The door slid shut, and began its descent.

In the lobby, Murdoc shook his head and pulled a cigarette and lighter out of his back pocket. "Still a bitch," he muttered, lighting the cigarette.

---

Trying to avoid looking at Murdoc's Winnebago sitting in the carpark, Paula unsteadily approached the door to 2D's bedroom. For a moment, she paused, looking at the plain white door.

She knocked, looking down at the floor.

Nothing.

Paula knocked again.

Through the thick door, she could hear someone moving about inside the room. She was about to knock again when the door opened.

2D's hair was mussed and the shirt and pants he was wearing wrinkled. His bare feet stayed on the carpet of his room, refusing to trod on the cold cement. He looked like he'd just fallen asleep after a long day, and it took him a moment to fully realize that the woman in a black dress standing outside his door wasn't Murdoc, or Noodle, or Russel, or even one of Kong's resident demons playing a trick on him.

His eyes widened. "Paula?"

She gave him a half-smile. "Hi Stu."

2D threw his arms around her energetically and drew the guitarist into a tight embrace. "Oh Paula, it's so good to see you!" He said.

Paula laughed a little. "It has been a while," she said.

2D opened the door more, allowing Paula to slip inside. She sat down on a corner of 2D's unmade bed.

After a moment of counting on his fingers, 2D said, "Yeah…eight years." His face fell as he remembered why Paula had left in the first place. "After you and Murdoc…" He sat down on the opposite corner. "You were gone before I could ask you what happened."

Paula stared down at the hem of her skirt. "Stu, you spent a year in that coma. Murdoc said I didn't visit you in the hospital and that's true, but it was horrible seeing you like that. The doctors said you might not wake up at all, or if you did, you'd have severe brain damage. During that year, I…met someone else at the store. We went out for a few months. Got on with my life, y'know? Wasn't the best choice I ever made, but it didn't hurt as much as watching you lie in that damn hospital bed.

When you woke up, I'd just broken up with record store guy. I thought, 'Perfect, he'll never know', and I thought that maybe it wouldn't matter and we could pick up from we'd left off. I was wrong. It wasn't the same after that. Our relationship before the accident revolved entirely around sex, no strings attached, we both knew it. But after the coma, you were so confused. After a while, I think you really did come to genuinely love me in a way you hadn't before, but you didn't have any idea what to do."

Paula let out her breath. "But Murdoc…" She paused. "Murdoc knew." She turned to 2D. "I was frustrated, with you and with myself. I knew I didn't love you the way you loved me , and that you weren't able to express that love to me in a way I understood." Her cheeks flushed again. "Stu, if I'd wanted to, I could've stopped Murdoc before it went that far. He's an asshole, but he does understand the concept of 'no means no'."

2D looked at the floor, his expression hard. "But you didn't stop, " he said.

"No, I didn't." Paula repeated quietly. "It all happened so fast, and it felt so good, I didn't want it to stop. It wasn't until it was all over that I saw what I'd done. I'd just betrayed the trust of the only person that saw something in me that _could_ be trusted, and I realized that I did really love you after all. But rather then tell you and watch your heart break, I did the cowardly thing and ran out of Kong."

The singer's face turned downhearted. "It wasn't easy for me to get over that, Paula. Not so soon after my coma, when I was still mixed-up in the head. What you did hurt me more then being run over with a car."

"God, I'm sorry, Stuart. I know it was painful for you."

2D closed his eyes. "It was. Took a while, but I eventually got over it."

Paula smiled sadly. "I'm glad. Least one of us did."

2D looked at Paula questioningly. "What?"

"After I left Kong, I felt lower then shit that I'd hurt you, and for also allowing myself to be used like that. And you know me, I always take the easy way out. I found a new band, got hooked on booze, and when that stopped making me feel good, I dived into stronger stuff. Thought I was better then that. Turns out I wasn't." Paula lifted the long sleeve of her shirt, allowing 2D to look at her arm. The veins running up and down her arm were dark blue, the pale skin mottled grey and scarred.

"I did so much shit and OD'd too many times to count. I was a walking corpse. When I straightened out again, I realized how much damage I'd done to myself. My liver was essentially dead. I had all kinds of infections from the needles. Most of the veins in my left arm were collapsed. I can't even play guitar anymore. Then the doctors dropped the bomb on me. I was diagnosed with liver cancer a few months ago and the prognosis isn't looking too great at the moment."

The singer stared at Paula open-mouthed. "…Paula?"

There were tears in her eyes when she looked at him, but she still smiled. "I'm dying, Stu. That's why I came back to Kong, to give you my side of that story, " The tears were freely running down both cheeks. " And to ask for your forgiveness, while I still can."

2D was right beside her now, grasping both of her shoulders lightly. "I forgave you a long time ago."

She was openly sobbing now. "Stu, you were the one person who ever really loved me. And I was so fucking _stupid_…"

The singer embraced her. Paula laid her head against 2D's chest and cried tears she'd been holding back for eight long years.

2D gently brushed the tears out of her eyes.

"I still love you," she said, her voice cracking.

2D kissed the top of her head. "Me too."

---

Morning came with Paula asleep on the bed, lying next to 2D, with one hand on his bare chest.

2D was awake, looking at Paula's latent body. She was gaunt and stick-thin, every bone trying poking through her skin. The makeup on her face had smeared during the night, revealing skin that was just as sickly as her arm.

Because of her buckteeth, Murdoc always called Paula ugly, but she wasn't. Even as sick as she was, she was still beautiful.

The singer tenderly brushed long black hair out of her face. She stirred slightly, and gave him a faint smile.

He kissed her forehead. "Good mornin', darling." Her only response was a content murmur as she fell back to sleep. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and began to sing softly, as to not wake the slumbering woman.

"_I saw that day_

_Lost my mind._

_Lord, I'm fine._"

"_Maybe in time  
__You'll want to be mine_."

END: on ANY other DAY


End file.
